Wednesday, December 19, 2012

A Christmas trash barrel adventure

Today is garbage day. Our trash cans need to be out before 7 AM. Especially in our neighborhood because we are at the beginning of the route. One of our next-door neighbors, an old man who is getting pretty frail, usually puts his trash barrel out the night before but he didn't last night. Did he forget or did he not have much to put out? He has forgotten in the past and then he has had to put out two barrels the next week. It's hard enough for him to get one out. So, this morning, as I was walking Charlie past his house, I wondered if I should put his trash out for him. Another thing you should know is that when I can, I take his empty trash can off the street and put it in his back yard - along with his morning paper. I used to do this only on rainy or cold days. But recently, I've been doing it every trash day - if the garbage guys have gone by the time I have to leave for work. And as I said, we are near the beginning of the route so they usually have gone. Usually.

So, as Charlie and I passed his house, I wondered, "If I put his trash out but the garbage guys aren't gone by the time I have to go to work, he won't know that his barrel is out on the street and it will sit outside until he gets out (if he does) or until I get home. But if I don't, he may have a lot of trash to take out next week and it will be a day late because of Christmas next week." Why is everything so hard? Another way to think about it is - why do I have to think about things so much?

Well, one good thing happened right away. I saw the garbage truck on the next street. So, at least they would pass our houses early and I could take the barrel back. So, Charlie and I decided to go look at his garbage. I immediately realized that it was good that we did. He had two barrels of trash to take out. His usual one (with nice handles) and another one like the one in the picture (with no handles). So, holding Charlie's leash, the pooper scooper, the "good" trash barrel and the unruly trash barrel, we made our way to the street. After what seemed like an hour, we made it to the street and set out the barrels.

After our walk (it took about 20 minutes), we got back to our street and saw the empty trash barrels. But the garbage guys had left one on its side. Guess which one! Yes, the one with no handles (as in the picture) and it was rolling with the wind. We were still 50 yards away (yards as in 3 feet per yard - not people's property lines). I knew what was going to happen. The barrel would role out into the street and some joker in a fat-assed truck would ram into it and break it. I tried to get Charlie to hurry along but there were just too many delightful smells to investigate (especially on garbage day) and too many places he had to mark. So, we're still 20 yards away when the barrel does one of its roles into the street as a car is approaching. Instead of bashing into the barrel, the driver slows down and gently nudges it back to the side of the road. What a nice person! I felt so relieved. Until the next gust of wind blew the barrel completely out on the road and, of course, a pickup truck arrived. "Here we go," I thought, "the can will be smashed." We were still a few yards away but again I was pleasantly surprised. The driver slowed down. As he did, the wind blew the barrel even farther on the road and right in his path. Cars were coming the other direction and he couldn't go around. Finally, Charlie and I reached him just as the driver was coming to a complete stop. It looked like he was getting out of his truck but I was able to wave to him and tell him I would get it. He looked so happy. He rolled down his window and shouted,"Thank you very much."

There was no time to explain to him that the whole thing was my fault. There was no time to tell him what a paranoid idiot I am. Everything went amazingly well yet I was still worrying. There was only time to grab the barrel and stop Charlie from sniffing his truck and delaying us even more. We wrestled the unruly barrel off the road, picked up the "good" barrel and picked up my neighbor's papers (one left from the night before - when he would have normally taken out the barrel) and took it all back to his yard. He would have an idea about what happened when he saw his papers on his back porch or at least when he took trash out the barrels later. I just hope he doesn't know how close he came to losing his unruly barrel!

[Update: I'm not sure why I called this "A Christmas trash barrel adventure". It had nothing to do with Christmas. But I did want it to show that I had good intentions when I started. And the two drivers being so nice may not have happened at other times of the year. Everyone does seem to act nicer around Christmas. And the TV stations and newspapers will tell us that being nice to each other is the true meaning of Christmas. That's not right, of course, and I've written about that in "The True Meaning of Christmas"]

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